Relationships ~ Time ~ Patience
A friend of mine , newly married for just a month, approached for some help.
“My husband is ‘not the same’ when in presence of my mother in law ….i am not ‘treated’ the way my sister in law is being ‘treated’ ….I am being given a ‘daughter in law’ treatment than a ‘ daughter’ ” .
The usual stuff we hear these days .
Now the best part is that she decided to seek help. Howeverthe most worrisome part and the reason that has been bothering me and urged me to share it at this platform, is the lack of patience and time we are giving to our relationships.
Not even a month and such a judgemental statements ! Why are we so keen to jump to conclusions. Why have we become so apathetic. Why can’t we see the perspective of the other person.
May be before entering such relationship we build or let others build false or unrealistic picture of the future and when our self drawn expectation clashes with the reality it gives birth to such sufferings.
Overplayed marriage preparations and larger than life ceremonies also play some role in adding the filmy and unrealistic touch to the most pious institution called marriage. When the ‘party’ ends may be the bride is not ready to accept the climax of drama and onset of reality which, although is even more beautiful, but demands time and patience .
Lets give every relationship some time . In fact, relationship needs be nurtured for a life time . Lets not be in a hurry to label. Let’s dedicate time and space for every relationship.
‘Mom in law’ – ‘daughter in law’ relationship is often overrated in a negative sense . In fact it’s the most important relationship that can build trust amongst the whole family . Mom in law has gone through all what you, as a new daughter in law , is facing . She can correlate well and if we are able to strike a chord with her , it can help us in all our other relationships, including the husband wife relationship. But as goes with every other , this too needs time , space and trust .
Let’s not compare new relationship with our old ones , other’s relationship with ours.Let’s give it a fresh start.
None is perfect but we can create a near-to perfect world by ignoring other’s imperfections and helping the common cause of peace and harmony not for outside but peace and harmony within ourselves. Only then can we experience the bliss of life in complete sense.
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Copyright Parminder Kaur Sharma 2018